Comments on: To lust or not to lust http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/ Erika Carney Haub's musings on life and God from South Central, L.A. Fri, 05 Sep 2008 06:10:26 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.0.4 by: Maria Dodson http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-107567 Thu, 31 Jan 2008 23:15:38 +0000 http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-107567 What a timely word for my family. Tonight we go to talk with our realtor. Your words are in my heart as we move forward. What a timely word for my family. Tonight we go to talk with our realtor. Your words are in my heart as we move forward.

]]> by: Nathanael http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-107408 Thu, 31 Jan 2008 13:26:01 +0000 http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-107408 Wonderful insights, sister. Thanks so much for your faithful posts. You are a great source of encouragement to me. Shalom Wonderful insights, sister.
Thanks so much for your faithful posts.
You are a great source of encouragement to me.

Shalom

]]> by: erika http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-107219 Wed, 30 Jan 2008 18:50:44 +0000 http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-107219 Kristin!!! So great to hear from you :) It would seem that we have some things in common in terms of kiddos and ministry. Praise God for your church plant--we'll have to come and see you when we are in town next time! Kristin!!!

So great to hear from you :) It would seem that we have some things in common in terms of kiddos and ministry. Praise God for your church plant–we’ll have to come and see you when we are in town next time!

]]> by: Kristin Jag http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-107082 Wed, 30 Jan 2008 06:51:46 +0000 http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-107082 Okay, first off, Erika Carney- I have missed you! Second, Fuller?!! That is so amazing! Daron and I loved our time when he was studying there. I taught in La Canada. Third, we were just remembering our time there a few days ago and we couldn't remember spending time in our house(or barn-a "guest house") that was probably as big as a bedroom. We were out and about spending time in community with others and not having to worry about keeping up the house. It was wonderful! We loved our time there, but knew that we would never be able to afford a home in that area. Now we are outside of Seattle and have a place of our own- very expensive to keep it up, as you said. I think of how much more space we have now and try and use it to benefit our ministry here. I always said that if I had a home with space we would invite others to stay with us or have weekly gatherings at our house. The best compliment I got last week was when a first timer to our house church came and told me how comfortable he was finding his way in our kitchen. Loved that. Anyway....it is hard not to have house lust(and house remorse, for that matter), but we need to continue to remind ourselves to open up whatever space we have to God's plan at the time for us, and use it! Miss you! Kristin (Halverson) Jag Okay, first off, Erika Carney- I have missed you! Second, Fuller?!! That is so amazing! Daron and I loved our time when he was studying there. I taught in La Canada. Third, we were just remembering our time there a few days ago and we couldn’t remember spending time in our house(or barn-a “guest house”) that was probably as big as a bedroom. We were out and about spending time in community with others and not having to worry about keeping up the house. It was wonderful! We loved our time there, but knew that we would never be able to afford a home in that area. Now we are outside of Seattle and have a place of our own- very expensive to keep it up, as you said. I think of how much more space we have now and try and use it to benefit our ministry here. I always said that if I had a home with space we would invite others to stay with us or have weekly gatherings at our house. The best compliment I got last week was when a first timer to our house church came and told me how comfortable he was finding his way in our kitchen. Loved that. Anyway….it is hard not to have house lust(and house remorse, for that matter), but we need to continue to remind ourselves to open up whatever space we have to God’s plan at the time for us, and use it!

Miss you!
Kristin (Halverson) Jag

]]> by: vtq http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-106976 Tue, 29 Jan 2008 23:00:41 +0000 http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-106976 I wonder if your real desire is not so much for a house and the extra space, but for a yard for the kids to go out and play in. I smile whenever I think of them getting up in the morning and putting their boots and coats on over their pj's so they could get right outside to play. The weather didn't matter to them...and they would stay out until someone dragged them in!! (And needless to say Doug would love the space to garden!!) I wonder if your real desire is not so much for a house and the extra space, but for a yard for the kids to go out and play in. I smile whenever I think of them getting up in the morning and putting their boots and coats on over their pj’s so they could get right outside to play. The weather didn’t matter to them…and they would stay out until someone dragged them in!! (And needless to say Doug would love the space to garden!!)

]]> by: My 2 Cents http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-106964 Tue, 29 Jan 2008 22:01:14 +0000 http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-106964 It's funny, when I read your quote: " that crowding is a great stressor for those who live in urban centers" I immediately thought about my brother-in-law who said that very same thing about being the 13th child in a family. There just isn't enough space and/or attention given to some when there is too much crowding. On the other end of the spectrum, from our life in ministry, sometimes homeownership is too much. We have so much going on with building into people's lives and church, etc., we really would rather the details of the domicile be taken care of by someone else. My 2 cents It’s funny, when I read your quote: ” that crowding is a great stressor for those who live in urban centers” I immediately thought about my brother-in-law who said that very same thing about being the 13th child in a family. There just isn’t enough space and/or attention given to some when there is too much crowding.

On the other end of the spectrum, from our life in ministry, sometimes homeownership is too much. We have so much going on with building into people’s lives and church, etc., we really would rather the details of the domicile be taken care of by someone else.
My 2 cents

]]> by: erika http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-106907 Tue, 29 Jan 2008 16:31:34 +0000 http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-106907 Ryan, Thanks for sharing your perspective! I think there are ways where our experience as a family echoes yours... I would add, though, that my peers here who are making the sacrifice of investing dollars and time in homes use those homes extensively in ministries of hospitality for our immediate church family as well as for others. We don't own a church building, so people's homes tend to play a pretty big part in the life of our church. I also think of all the times someone has needed housing and one of our homeowners has been able to step in and offer space. I grew up in a home like that and now I see my sister following my parents' example. Ryan,

Thanks for sharing your perspective! I think there are ways where our experience as a family echoes yours…

I would add, though, that my peers here who are making the sacrifice of investing dollars and time in homes use those homes extensively in ministries of hospitality for our immediate church family as well as for others. We don’t own a church building, so people’s homes tend to play a pretty big part in the life of our church. I also think of all the times someone has needed housing and one of our homeowners has been able to step in and offer space. I grew up in a home like that and now I see my sister following my parents’ example.

]]> by: erika http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-106904 Tue, 29 Jan 2008 16:26:05 +0000 http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-106904 Brad, Thanks for adding your thoughts on home ownership. I totally agree with that value, and if there were any way to do it, we would. Many of our peers got in a few years ago, but now there is nothing below 700K. On a Fuller Seminary salary and part time mission work pay, there really just is no way. It seems like the trend here in the L.A. area (and maybe more of CA too) is for churches to do equity-sharing arrangements to help their pastors move into homes. We don't exactly have folks of that caliber of resource in our church family... In our case, I think the home ownership piece contributes a lot to people's sense of investment in this community and commitment for the long haul. My friends who own their homes are not likely to up and move any time soon. For those who rent, there is simply less that ties you to a place, and for our parish mission, place matters immensely. Brad,

Thanks for adding your thoughts on home ownership. I totally agree with that value, and if there were any way to do it, we would. Many of our peers got in a few years ago, but now there is nothing below 700K. On a Fuller Seminary salary and part time mission work pay, there really just is no way. It seems like the trend here in the L.A. area (and maybe more of CA too) is for churches to do equity-sharing arrangements to help their pastors move into homes. We don’t exactly have folks of that caliber of resource in our church family…

In our case, I think the home ownership piece contributes a lot to people’s sense of investment in this community and commitment for the long haul. My friends who own their homes are not likely to up and move any time soon. For those who rent, there is simply less that ties you to a place, and for our parish mission, place matters immensely.

]]> by: Ryan http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-106880 Tue, 29 Jan 2008 14:32:49 +0000 http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-106880 My wife, my two middle school aged daughters and I are living in an 800 square foot apartment in Daejeon, South Korea. As one who has owned and lived in an "average" house in a very spacious Northwestern State in the USA, I must say that for now not living in a house has been a blessing. The living space in our apartment is much tighter than our home in the States but it has resulted in us "living" together rather than just spreading out and doing our own thing. We actually talk more, laugh more and see each other more. Renting and living in an apartment has been a great boost to available time. No lawn to mow, no leaves to rake, no yard to water, no fix-its every other week, no trips to Home Depot (I haven't seen one here in South Korea), etc. It has been amazing to see how much time it took to maintain a home. Now we spend that time together as a family, with friends and engaging with others in our community. In suburbia I was too busy trying to keep my place from being a sore spot in the neighborhood that I didn't have or rather take the time to get to know my neighbors. So it goes, "A house doesn't make a home," and we have found this to be true--we are treasuring our family time and relationships living here together in a rented apartment in South Korea. My wife, my two middle school aged daughters and I are living in an 800 square foot apartment in Daejeon, South Korea. As one who has owned and lived in an “average” house in a very spacious Northwestern State in the USA, I must say that for now not living in a house has been a blessing.

The living space in our apartment is much tighter than our home in the States but it has resulted in us “living” together rather than just spreading out and doing our own thing. We actually talk more, laugh more and see each other more.

Renting and living in an apartment has been a great boost to available time. No lawn to mow, no leaves to rake, no yard to water, no fix-its every other week, no trips to Home Depot (I haven’t seen one here in South Korea), etc.

It has been amazing to see how much time it took to maintain a home. Now we spend that time together as a family, with friends and engaging with others in our community. In suburbia I was too busy trying to keep my place from being a sore spot in the neighborhood that I didn’t have or rather take the time to get to know my neighbors.

So it goes, “A house doesn’t make a home,” and we have found this to be true–we are treasuring our family time and relationships living here together in a rented apartment in South Korea.

]]> by: PTL http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-106799 Tue, 29 Jan 2008 07:38:59 +0000 http://erika.haub.net/to-lust-or-not-to-lust/01/#comment-106799 Two experiences from my life brought this into focus for me: A seminary friend from Korea, upon seeing a picture of my two story home (for only 2 of us) looked directly at me and said incredulously: "This is YOUR house?!?" A colleague who happened to be Native American really got me thinking when she told me she never in her life intended to own property - as a statement about her family's generational story, and she just couldn't see the need of it and didn't believe it necessary or correct for a follower of Jesus. She was a Methodist minister and had taken an oath to go wherever she was sent by her bishop, which may have also influenced her decision. I've thought about her many times when longing for home ownership. All I know is that I miss owning a home - for now I live in someone else's home, and it's lovely, but there is something to having a little bit of land and a house to call home, and having it large enough to be able to welcome family. Two experiences from my life brought this into focus for me: A seminary friend from Korea, upon seeing a picture of my two story home (for only 2 of us) looked directly at me and said incredulously: “This is YOUR house?!?”

A colleague who happened to be Native American really got me thinking when she told me she never in her life intended to own property - as a statement about her family’s generational story, and she just couldn’t see the need of it and didn’t believe it necessary or correct for a follower of Jesus. She was a Methodist minister and had taken an oath to go wherever she was sent by her bishop, which may have also influenced her decision. I’ve thought about her many times when longing for home ownership.

All I know is that I miss owning a home - for now I live in someone else’s home, and it’s lovely, but there is something to having a little bit of land and a house to call home, and having it large enough to be able to welcome family.

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